What GOD's Whole Armor Does For Us
I grew up in a family that didn't have God's armor...and it showed.
Jesus:
“When the unclean spirit has gone out of a person, it passes
through waterless places seeking rest, but finds none. Then it
says, ‘I will return to my house from which I came.’ And when it
comes, it finds the house empty, swept, and put in order. Then it
goes and brings with it seven other spirits more evil than itself,
and they enter and dwell there, and the last state of that person
is worse than the first. So also will it be with this evil generation.”
– Matthew 12:43-45
My dad battled addiction for much of his adult life. A retrospective look at his birth family might explain the reason behind his issues of dependency; alcoholism affected his dad and just about every one of his 10 siblings. Undoubtedly, he had “that” gene, but it does not let my dad off the hook.
My dad was a “Saturday vigil mass-only” Christian. He attended church every Saturday evening, did his part as an usher, and, as far as he was concerned, that was “enough”. He didn’t go home and read the Bible; he didn’t talk about the Gospel or God’s Commandments; he didn’t treat his family as God instructed all Christian husbands/dads; he didn’t pray. Our Bible stayed in our bookcase, and that was that. Because my dad paid no attention to God’s instructions on how to raise children, and virtually ignored God and His Commandments, the Holy Spirit did not dwell in our home. I spent my childhood having to navigate an environment filled with tension, created and fueled by my dad’s toxicity and dysfunction. The Holy Spirit had not been present in the lives of my dad’s birth family since before his birth…and it showed.
While many may believe that the absence of God, via the Holy Spirit, has no bearing on circumstances, I’m here to say that {His absence} absolutely does. Without God’s abiding Spirit, dwelling within our hearts, we are left spiritually vulnerable. My childhood was chronically chaotic. My dad’s lack of true faith in God left him widely susceptible to a destructive abuse of alcohol and Valium.
Nor thieves, nor the greedy, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God. – 1 Corinthians 6:10
My dad chose alcoholism and pills above everything else – God, family, and himself. Nothing could sway him from getting his fix. We, as a family, tried to intervene but it didn’t work. We eventually discovered that his drinking problem was far worse than we realized; overtly, he was drinking beer and covertly, hard liquor in various containers he kept hidden throughout the house. How he didn’t kill us from falling asleep {drunk} with lit cigarettes or driving, while strung up on a mix of alcohol and Valium, is a miracle from God. I spent most of my life healing from the pain of the alcohol-fueled abuse my dad inflicted upon my mom and me, not fully understanding what really happened during those stolen years. I understand now.
My dad’s soul was an “open house” for any sinister spirit{s} looking for a home. Whichever entity that took up residence within my dad certainly wreaked havoc on him and our family. What should have happened was my father getting rehab and replacing his habits with faith in God. If he had accepted Jesus and the Holy Spirit in his heart, the armor of God would have protected him from those entities when they tried to take control again.
Our bodies serve as temples for God to live within us via the Holy Spirit. When we accept Jesus, we receive spiritual protection from any unclean spirit whose mission it is to harm us and draw us away from God. My dad did not have God in his heart and, therefore, he could not ward off the destructive nature of God’s enemy in the battle for his soul. It is a dad’s job to be the spiritual leader for his family, and set an example for his children. When the children learn how to be spiritual leaders, they continue the presence of spiritual protection for their own families.
What I’ve written here isn’t exclusive to addictions to alcohol or prescription medication. It also applies to:
addictions to sex, gambling or shopping, etc.
abusive behavior {in familial, romantic, platonic, neighbor relationships}
destructive behavioral patterns, such as self-harm and/or suicide attempts
criminal behavior
resistance to authority {disrespect/disobedience of/toward parents, teachers, employers, law enforcement}
dysfunctional or toxic behavior
apathy, inconsideration of others
Our homes are our refuge from the outside world. Our family dynamic must be a functional, healthy one, in which we feel loved, peaceful, respected, and secure. If we’re experiencing tension, stress, depression, or anxiety, we must look more closely at the underlying reasons for what’s going wrong, starting with the people around us. In my case, the source of the dysfunction was my dad, the man God gave me to mentor/teach me, protect me, support me, make me feel secure, and set the standard for the way I allowed other men to treat me. Instead, I felt anything but secure in my dad’s presence; I felt abandoned by him and I lived with anxiety and feelings of inadequacy for most of my life. The lifelong message replaying in the back of my mind was, “If my own dad doesn’t love me, how can I expect anyone else to?” But I was viewing it the wrong way.
That wasn’t my dad. It was the wicked spirit within him that continually disrupted our family life and damaged our relationships. The same is true of anyone who constantly treats us badly, and we must remember that Satan uses people to sow division, hatred, doubt, chaos, and fear in others. People aren’t evil; it’s when they don’t have God’s armor of protection that enables Satan to take over and act through them to do his dirty work.
But you must remember, beloved, the predictions of the apostles of our Lord Jesus Christ. They said to you, “In the last time there will be scoffers, following their own ungodly passions.” It is these who cause divisions, worldly people, devoid of the Spirit.
– Jude 1:17-19
I’ve forgiven my dad, but I still feel very saddened by the way he struggled because he didn’t know how to break the cycle of dysfunction or dependency. He lived his life believing he could do the bare minimum and still be a Christian. He didn’t understand his addiction or why he couldn’t break free from it. He was merely trying to fill an empty hole, masking his problems and emotional damage with numbing agents, when God was all he needed. I wish I’d known then what I know now so that I could have talked to my parents about God and the Bible; the presence of God in our family would have made all the difference in the world.
Put on the whole armor of God, that you may be able to stand against the schemes of the devil. - Ephesians 6:11
I’m so sorry you had such a troubled childhood due to the addictions of your father. I’m am so glad you have broken that cycle and have Christ as the center of your home. Do not despair, however. The beauty of God’s plan is that your father is being taught on the other side of the veil. He has the opportunity to repent and receive all the blessings and promises God wants to bestow upon all His children!